Thursday, December 20, 2007

Foster parenting/adoption

Mike and I completed our last class for foster parenting/adoption today ..... thanks Mom and G for coming to watch Matthew for 8 hours! (Had to give them a crash course on replacing the mic key button if it happened to come out.)

Apparently Las Vegas needs 450 families to help care for these kids.
We've taken about 27 hours of classes ..... today's class was the most eye opening of them all.
The instructor said things to help us to see it from these kids perspective, and frankly... it was so sad. I can't imagine being passed around and not having my very own loving family.

We were actually "certified" as of October... but we all decided to wait until the end of RSV/flu season before we start taking on children ~ for Matthew's sake. We have agreed to take on mildly medically fragile babies .... no trachs ... or wheelchairs.... but I can handle g~tubes, breathing treatments and medications... We are practically nurses by now anyway.

I think for now, I only want to take only newborns straight out of the NICU... I think they would be the safest as far as sickness is concerned. I simply can't take any chances with Matthew getting sick.

I am shocked as to how many of these poor children are out there w/o loving and caring parents. A lot of these kids don't even have pictures of themselves from their past.
Not only that, but so many have been abused!! It's hard to believe that adults can be so awful to children.
Don't they realize that they are screwing them ROYALLY??? They're causing permanent damage in these children. How can they not care?? I don't get it.

They told us today in class that more than 1/2 of prison inmates were foster kids ... and that most of the homeless were foster kids ... *shakes head*

It makes me so mad that people choose to have children, but then they are so selfish and continue to do drugs and live the wrong kind of life. I was so irritated today during the class, listening to how screwed up these kids are BECAUSE OF THE CRAPPY PARENTS!

We feel the break down of the family is the biggest reason why our society is such a mess.

It makes me sick too, that dads can just run out on their children and force the "government" to be the daddies. You can't even begin to imagine how much all this costs the state/government.
Mind boggling!!!

Selfish selfish selfish people.

I am scared to death ... that's for sure. I hope I can handle it all ... I have my doubts.
Matthew is a lot of work ... but Mike is quite convinced that we need to do this. He listens to podcasts of Focus on the Family and this is how this all came to be. He is also into the Adoption Stories. He's leading this thing... he's the "good one"...

22 comments:

Little Baby Manning said...

okay i think what you're doing is wonderful! ...for Matthew too. I just hope you don't get too attached to these little sweet babies - you might end up with a house full of little ones! :) as soon as our boys are a little older, i would love doing something like this..... can't wait to hear your experiences.

xxx lisa
btw - love the music

Terri@SteelMagnolia said...

Lisa!
Thanks for teaching me out to get the music ;-)
I do love the songs I picked too..

I did have a couple more Kenny Chesney ones, but they were only like 30 seconds long???

crabby old man said...

IT WILL WORK OUT FOR YOU, I THINK ANYONE THAT ABUSES OR NEGLECT KIDS ARE THE SCUM OF THE EARTH

Multi-tasking Mommy said...

WOW! You and Mike truly are very special people who have HUGE hearts. Any child would be blessed to be welcomed into your home! It's a hard job, but something tells me both of you are the perfect people for it!
In my time of teaching Kindergarten, I met many foster parents/kids...you are AWESOME!!!

g-man said...

I totally applaud your effort and commitment. You both are truly manifestations of the grace of God. I know you will help many. I look forward to hearing your stories. Hugs to you both. You guys rock!

g-man said...

P.s. Was playing "catch-up" Love the new pictures of Beaver. It is coming along nicely. :) It is that time of the year when there is a cookie on every flat surface, partake and enjoy, afterwards go to the gym and enjoy the sweating. :)

furiousBall said...

Terri, this is awesome. I am really happy to hear about you and Mike doing this. More people like you two would do a whole lot of good for this rock we're all spinning on.

Merle Sneed said...

You and Mike are such lovely people Terri. good for you.

Terri@SteelMagnolia said...

It's really more Mike ...
he's into this more than I am ...
(I'm more of the selfish one)

of course it pulls my heartstrings to hear about these poor kids...
you can't help but want to help them....

BUT I am very nervous about it..

it's mostly all Mike ... he's the one being driven .... I can't really take any credit for being so good....

Chris H said...

This is exactly what Stew and I were going to be doing ... if we hadn't ended up with two more babies of our own to raise! By the time Brylee and Griffin get to an age where we would feel happy taking on other wee kids we will be too darn old! Wasn't meant for us then, but I take my hat off to you and Mike for doing it. I too am amazed and immensely saddened when I think about all the abused and abandoned children out there... and I could shoot all those useless, heartless birth parents! (our daughter is one of those useless parents!)

Gina said...

I am so proud of you two! What an amazing start you are going to give to, hopefully, many babies.

I wish there were more that the government could do to prevent the break down of the family. Religion alone is not solving a worldwide problem. Not that sex after marriage solves everything, but it's the best start for God's children. They need a mom and a dad that care and nurture them. It's amazing what balance can be found in traditional family life.

Andrea W. said...

Wow, I think you and Mike are so great! I've always hoped that we'll have an opportunity to open our home someday to more kids. It's heartbreaking to become aware of the horrible circumstances children are thrown into by the choices of others. You must be wonderful people for God to have entrusted Matthew to you, so I have no doubt you have much to offer another child/children.

Anonymous said...

Terri

Thanks for the good post. Thanks to you and to Mike too for all you do and plan to do for the kids. Have a Merry Christmas.

cfs

Jackie said...

"He's leading this thing... he's the "good one"..."

Terri Girl...don't cut yourself short! Both of you are beyond belief!! I'm so proud to be associated with people such as you!!

Michael said...

One thing is for sure, the instructors in our classes made sure we were aware of the challenges these kids face. Even though they are desperate for adoptive/foster parents, they never painted an unrealistically rosy picture. But as they went through the list of behavioral problems foster children are prone to experience, I just kept reminding myself of a speech that Pastor/Author Rick Warren gave. He cited the many references in the bible to caring for widows & orphans. Then he listed some famous people who were adopted:

Dave Thomas - entrepreneur: founder of Wendy's
Debbie Harry - singer
Edgar Allan Poe - poet, writer
Eleanor Roosevelt - First Lady
Eric Dickerson - athlete
Esther - Adopted Queen who saved the Jews
Faith Hill - country singer
George Washington Carver - inventor
Jesus - adopted by Joseph the carpenter (Bible)
Jim Palmer - athlete
John Hancock - Founding Father
John Lennon - musician
Lee Majors - actor
Melissa Gilbert - actress
Michael Reagan - author, talk show host
Moses - Biblical leader
Nancy Reagan - First Lady
Nat King Cole - singer
President Gerald Ford - politician
President William Clinton - politician
Priscilla Presley - actress
Ray Liotta - actor
Sarah McLachlan - singer
Scott Hamilton - figure skater
Steve Jobs - entrepreneur: co-founder of Apple computer
Tim McGraw - country singer

Anonymous said...

Michael

Thanks for all you do and thanks for posting that listing of adopted kids, very interesting. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

cfs

Julie said...

Have Faith and it will all work out. Congrats to you both for taking such a bold step. I really admire that. These are special little people and they need to be cherished and loved, not thrown out like trash. I agree, it is very irritating.

Blessings to your family and Merry Christmas.

Julie

Terry said...

Hi Terri,

I am so glad I stopped by today to read this post. You know I am very Pro Adoption. I agree with everything you say (as I always do) about the lousy parents and the suffering kids. I will email you some stuff about how important dads are, just like you said.

I am proud of you. You are good to open your home to these kids in need. I understand you choosing to only take newborns at this point too. I'd consider doing foster care but I'd want little, little kids. I'd be afraid that the big ones, who had been abused, may in some way harm my kids. I've got to protect my kids even though I feel lots of sympathy for these foster kids that have been through so much at no fault of their own. They were just unfortunate enough to have lousy parents.

I can't wait to hear more!

Rick Rockhill said...

wow. you continue to impress me to no end. Lot's of blessings to you!!
Merry Christmas

-Rick

Ann(ie) said...

See I didn't think I could admire you and Mike anymore than I do. And here I am reading this post and thinking you guys are angels on earth. Standing and clapping my friend!!

Bubblewench said...

Having been adopted at birth, thankfully by a loving family, I appreciate what you are doing. And it is crazy that people think they can just have kids and if they don't want them, they can 'toss them away'.

I was that baby. I was seriously ill when I was born, and it was when my birth mother found that out she gave me up. You can argue she did the right thing, she couldn't take care of me, but I can argue back, why did she bother to have me then? They knew I was sick before I was born.

Anyway, not about me, about the rest of the kids that need YOU & MIKE! Thank you for taking them into your home and taking care of them.

? said...

We feel the break down of the family is the biggest reason why our society is such a mess.

Amen, sister!

You and Mike are angels sent from God. Truly. Children who are put in your care are going to be very, very lucky.

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